Finding balance.

Balance has been my word for 2019. Since I can remember I spend my time and energy doing. I go from one thing to the next wondering why I can’t ever accomplishing everything I want to get done. I like to be busy and learning to be still is so stinkin hard for me. Balance in my life was something I knew I needed to work on.

Being a wife, mom, daughter, sister, teacher, friend, Instagramer, and superwoman is pretty hard. I thought when the kids got older, I would have more time. I thought that if I got off early I would have more time. I thought that if I had my groceries delivered I would have more time. The list goes on. Poof. No more time. Do you ever wish you had just enough seconds in the day to BAM! Get it ALL done? It’s funny how that works. No matter how I try to execute my day. There will never be enough time.

The past 3 years being on this journey to lose my weight I realized I had lots of things that needed to work on as well. My inside. It cuts deep to know that I focused so hard on losing weight that I might have missed out on things around me. I am not beating myself up about it. I had to focus on me. So I could be a better me. Embracing I made mistakes but working on it everyday. That’s the beautiful thing about life. Grace. Today I see it. I can embrace it. Finding joy again. Living fully not just for me but for the incredible, sweet souls I love so much. Who love me. It’s just beautiful.

So that’s why I wanted to work on balance this year. It’s not that I need limitless time. I need to learn to work and do the things smarter not harder. Spending my time so busy that I miss all the beautiful things around me. The moments to sit and chat with my love after a long day. A sweet squeeze from my Parker. The long, very elaborate, TMI stories my sweet baby girl wants to tell me. Responding to the anticipated call from Chaz, who I never get to see. Taking time to listen to the tiny human that calls you teacher. Being a good friend and sending a text just to let them know you love them. To opening my Bible and spending some much needed quite time with Jesus.

I need to stop being such a busy body and enjoy the sweet precious moments in front of me. Scheduling time to do what I need to do, love to do, and have to do. Laugh more. Be more intentional. Give more. Listen more. Take it all in. I can’t allow one of the hardest seasons in my life pass me by. Period.

So today and everyday I will focus on finding balance. Determined to not allow another day to fade away like a dream. It’s not hard. Well, yes it is. Who am I kidding? Just going to take one day at a time. Maybe an hour at a time. Well let’s just say…ONE SECOND AT A TIME.